and it's time i post something here publicly.
i've got a bunch of unpublished posts i've started over the past year. nothing seemed to stick, though. even the things i wrote and posted didn't feel right any more so i removed those.
so, what the deal is? what's the problem?
adding to this as i rediscover some favorites
glen hansard - what happens when the heart just stops
The Conversation, Motion City Soundtrack - Julia Nunes
i visited phoenix recently for my mom's birthday. it was what i would describe as a "medium intensity" visit.
i got high, saw some old friends. wielded my masculinity like a scalpel, defusing a situation between a methhead and my mom. helped keep an eighteen year-old kid from hurting himself during a seizure with his small girlfriend - twice.
on the last day of the year I can safely say 2018 has been the most challenging year of my life.
i could make the argument it was the worst year of my life. In a lot of ways that is true.
originally posted somewhere ~5 years ago. reposting to refer to later.
back when i was seeing kg i heard over and over again, “but what about you?” i never had an answer to that question and i still don’t.
i think it's weird that we do things we know are bad for us because we know they will make us feel good.
i've done this a lot in my life, in part due to my ADD, and in part because i just don't have good patterns. i have a long, established history doing what makes me feel good without considering the long term cost.
at six months i don't know where i am.
what i miss the most is my friend, their presence in my life. i have never had a friend like that, and now i don't again.
i imagine that i'm now feeling all the things they already were forced through. it makes me hurt for them.
i hate you bojack horseman